Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Torture Devices of Death and Doom. Plus also? Spiders.

I finally did it.

I sucked it up and got a gym membership.

All these years I've been avoiding strength training.

*Cue whining*

Why do I have to?

It's so hard.

I don't want to look like a boy.

Can't I just run?

*End whining*

But now I have finally seen the light.

I WANT muscle.

Know why? Because muscle is awesome. It burns calories. And if you burn more calories? You get to eat more yummy stuff!

Plus. I don't want to be so... squishy.

The thing is, I'm really intimidated. I have no. idea. where to begin. All the information out there is completely overwhelming to me.

That's why I like cardio so much. You put your sneakers on and then you either go outside or step on the treadmill and run like you're being chased by an army of vengeful blood-sucking spider monsters.

That's it. Easy peasy.

My gym membership comes with 3 free personal training sessions.

I am going to see if I get any say in what happens during those sessions. I mean that's what personal is, right? Personal to me?

Cuz personally I would love for someone to teach me how to use all the torture-looking devices hanging around my gym!

I wanna be buff baby!

Okay not buff. But I want to rev up my metabolism and turn my body into a lean, mean, bikini-wearing, calorie-burning machine!